Tuesday, 9 December 2008

Shameful confession

I am now shut in my self-imposed monastery of singledom and celibacy refusing any further contact with men for a little while. As a matter of fact I would like to declare that I am going to spend the next year without men. At all. Not even casual hook ups. There, it's done. I've just magically avoided myself 12 months of hassle until December 2009.

The reason behind my new-found motivation for vows of celibacy? I got strange news today. About the Lover. You may ask who was he again?

Let's skip back to August which will always be affectionately known as Man Month 2008 with so many of them appearing into my horizon. One Saturday night I went for a drink for a friend's birthday, in a bar. I was not in a party mood and feeling a bit tired I set myself a target of staying in this bar for my friend's birthday for one hour. After which I would gracefully excuse myself and head home for a good rest.

Turns out I went home at 8 am that night (rather next morning). In retrospect, agreeing to drink more than 1.5 bottles of champagne per person had not been a great idea. Getting into a posh memebrs-only nightclub when totally drunk and wearing very casual clothes and Jesus-sandals had been very lucky. Drinking some more champagne at the nightclub (paid for by yours truly who nearly had a heart attack when finding the receipt the next day) had also been a mistake in retrospect. The rest of the evening was a blur. I was happy as a teddy bear on speed thanks to the champagne. And I started talking to this guy.

One thing led to another... I am not big on one night stands especially with total strangers (as a matter of fact I truly believe they are not smart at all) but I am ashamed to say this was a very typical case of it. We rode the taxi up the windy roads of Hong Kong hills, all the way up to the Peak, ie the posh part of town. We arrived to this mansion, seriously MANSION with an amazing view of the whole city. I had never seen such a huge home in HK. For a guy who was in his mid-thirties, the house was quite impressive.

Again, one thing led to another... Let's just say that the most painful part of the story, was when I opened my eyes at 7.45 am the next day. I glanced next to me to the snoring naked guy and I felt for the first time in my life that cinema moment where the girl slaps her head and says "Oh noooo noooo noooo please tell me I am dreaming this". He is quite a good looking guy but like that, asleep, naked and snoring, I just thought I needed to get out of there double quick. So I left him a quick note apologizing for not waking him but that it was too early, and I left my number (because that felt classier). Argh, I recall the cringeworthy walk of shame past the security staff of the building, whom I had to ask for help to call a taxi for me.

From my hazy memory I recalled he had told me he was "separated" from his wife. And the place did look like a bachelor pad with no feminine presence. But nevertheless I was quite sure I would never see him again. Perhaps because I was suspicious of someone who claims to be just separated. Perhaps because I knew the way we had began knowing each other was a natural dead end, no good relationship could come out of it. Perhaps because I knew we were just too different. He texted me that night asking if I got home ok. Politely I said yes thanks.

To cut a long story short, I saw the Lover once more, decided it was a stupid sort of story (especially because I am still convinced he is more married than he claims to be, I got more signs I was probably right about that), and I never saw him again. He tried to call a couple of times after that but I happened to miss those calls and after a while the dust settled on this story. That is how I came to name him the Lover, because I think I would have been his Mistress had I been game. So that was the end of that.

Until today, when I read something in the special newspaper of my line of work which made me jump up from my chair and startle my colleagues by yelling "SHIIIIIIT". The news was that the Lover, who apparently is a big enough hot shot to make the news, had been hired in the firm I work for, due to start in January. Great.


Nicey said...


Nice story hun, missed it the first time around. Just keep your head down and get on with doing a good job, be polite and keep your distance don't need to tell you to suck eggs eh ....
Anyway if the truth be known he will be probably be feeling the same as you and at least that you have the advantage that your expecting him, I would love to see his face when he sees you ....


Anon Y Mouse said...

yeah, be professional, no worries. won't be a problem.

Cosima said...

They hire new people at your firm? Who would have thought?

I second the advice above.

Evie said...

Nicey - We would work on different floors, the building is huge, but one day I do hope to bump into him just to see his face..
Anon - Yeah, to be honest am not that worried, he will probably be more stressed I will not keep it secret.
Cosima - well, for each hire we fire 10 people, crazy times..

Charles said...

Watch "Blue Orchids"... this could work to your advantage.

Cynnie said...

that is the best story ever ..